Ever heard of a murder so gruesome — and strange, but I’m still getting to that part — that the only way to identify the victim’s body was to check the serial number on the breast implants? Sure you have. It happened not even 10 days ago and it’s been all over the news — not to mention Blogosphere — ever since.

Of course, I’m talking about Ryan Jenkins, the man married to bikini model Jasmine Fiore who is now a suspect in his wife’s unthinkable murder.


Not only was Fiore murdered in cold blood (yes, allegedly, but read on to see the details and you decide for yourself on my choice words there), but her body was chopped up, stuffed in a suitcase and thrown in a trash bin. Even her fingers and teeth were removed, according to Zap 2 News and Buzz.

Who would have thought to pop out those bulbous breast implants after murdering someone along with the whole bleach and soap cleanup routine to destroy the evidence, too? Just when you think that fingerprints and dental records are the only ways you can identify a body as tortured as Fiore’s… They’ve got serial numbers on them that can lead back to you! Well, now we know. Pay attention here all you future killers so you don’t make the same mistake as this moron.

So the latest on this alleged murderer, well, it only gets better.

Familiar with the VH1 reality TV show Megan Wants a Millionaire? No, me either. At least not until last night when all this news broke. The show just got canceled, and not because it had an audience of all but one, but because Jenkins was a finalist.

Jenkins actually met Fiore just after the filming of the show, as reported by Zap 2 News and Buzz.

The show is essentially a trashy version of the latest Bachelorette, with Megan Hauserman the star…and also one of the many rejects sent home on the last season of Rock of Love. Lovely, eh?

Jenkins was portrayed as an investment banker nicknamed “Smooth Operator” with a net worth of $2.5 million, Zap 2 News and Buzz reported.

(What else isn’t real about reality TV shows?)

Yeah, I didn’t really believe it either, but it’s true.

(What, honestly, is next in this world? What isn’t this world capable of? You really can’t but think that with stories like this…)

Not surprisingly, Jenkins fled…to Oh Canada as soon as he heard the cops were after him…on foot no less. So now the manhunt’s on.

On that note, who in his situation would actually turn to Canada to escape murder charges? Hasn’t he ever seen any movies? Murderers, people running away from fraud, not paying their taxes and overall anything life ruining run away to Mexico. Duh. What was this guy thinking?

One thing’s for sure. This lying, cheating, murdering, Rock of Love double reject is going to be caught. It’s just a matter of time. In the mean time, I’m just going to laugh all the way until he’s in that cold jail cell. What a moron.